You’re Not Meant to Be for Everyone…
Lately life hasn’t been quiet about its changes
It’s been loud in a way that forces you to pay attention
Not chaos for the sake of chaos…
Clarity
In dynamics shifting
In friendships changing
In moments that make you stop and really look at what is in front of you instead of what you hoped it was
And once you see it you can’t unsee it
People move differently
Conversations feel different
Energy feels inconsistent
Things that used to feel natural start to feel forced
That kind of loud is uncomfortable
Because part of you wants to hold onto what things were
You want to give the benefit of the doubt
You want to believe it is temporary
But deep down you know it is not
This is where the shift happens
And one thing I am really learning is this
Not being for everyone is not the same thing as not being inclusive
That matters
Because I will always believe in inclusivity
In creating space
In welcoming people
In building something where people feel seen and part of something real
But inclusivity does not mean access to me without boundaries
It does not mean I have to shrink to be accepted
It does not mean I have to carry relationships that no longer feel aligned
You can be inclusive and still be selective about your energy
You can welcome people in and still recognize who is meant to stay close
You can build community without losing yourself inside of it
There is a difference
And I think a lot of us confuse the two
We think being a good person means being everything for everyone
Being available
Being understanding
Being the one who holds it all together
But there is a line between showing up for people and abandoning yourself
I have crossed that line before
More than once
Given too much
Explained too much
Stayed longer than I should have
Tried to fix things that were not mine to fix
Now I am starting to understand the difference between effort and alignment
Effort feels heavy
Like constantly explaining yourself
Like trying to be understood by people who already decided who you are
Like carrying something that should not feel this hard
Alignment feels steady
It is mutual
It does not leave you questioning your place
It does not require you to prove your worth
And once you feel that difference it changes everything
Some friendships do not end with a big moment
They shift
They get quieter
They feel different
And sometimes that is all the answer you need
I used to think every change needed a conversation
Closure
An explanation
Now I understand that sometimes the change is the closure
Not everyone is meant to stay
Not everyone is meant to grow with you
Not everyone is meant to understand you
And that does not make you wrong
It just means you are no longer aligned
So yes it has been loud lately
But maybe that is the point
Maybe the noise is what forces the truth to the surface
I am not closing myself off
I am getting clear
I still believe in people
I still believe in community
I still believe in building something bigger than myself
But I also believe in protecting my peace
Honoring my growth
And being honest about what feels right
And if that means I am not for everyone anymore
I am finally okay with that